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maryland crab soup

Growing up in Houston meant growing up believing that Gulf shrimp and crawfish reigned supreme in the crustacean world. And while I don’t necessarily consider this worldview having changed, living in the mid-Atlantic for the past five years has opened my eyes to the beauty that is the Maryland blue crab.

Crab cakes…crab dip…crab chips...crab gumbo. I’m summoning Bubba Gump here for inspiration. I cannot get enough.

eat me.

One of my favorite crab recipes is Maryland crab soup, a regional specialty that forsakes the typical creamy base that so regularly populates seafood soups. It’s instead tomato-based, brothy, loaded with beautiful veggies and wonderfully spicy when done correctly.

This is a definite must-order for anyone visiting or new to the mid-Atlantic region, and is likely to be added to our regular recipe rotation after the hangover salvation it provided for both of us alongside a tray of cheddar-garlic biscuits in the midst of last night’s cold, rainy drizzle and Drew Brees’ record-breaking touchdown pass.

Crab soup and football. Because that’s what Maryland does.

 maryland crab soup

(***note: 'round here, crab soup vegetables are sold packaged together in the frozen section at some grocery stores. But I listed all of them here anyway for those going it from scratch.***)

celery, onions, carrots (mirepoix)

butter or olive oil

garlic

potatoes

green beans

lima beans

peas

corn

crab (I used a combo of claw and lump meat – but whatever kind is on hand is fine. Except for imitation crab. That is definitely not OK.)

canned diced tomatoes

vegetable broth

old bay

salt & pepper

Texas Pete’s or Tabasco

Sautee and season the mirepoix in butter or olive oil over medium heat until onions are fragrant. Add garlic, vegetables, tomatoes, old bay and vegetable broth over high heat. Bring to rolling boil, then reduce heat to a healthy simmer. Add crab and simmer for 15-20 minutes while biscuits bake. Add salt & pepper and hot sauce to taste.

Ensalada suroeste picante (spicy southwest salad)

Ah, salad. Few foods in the American diet share its level of ubiquity. One could even argue that it’s experiencing a sudden upsurge, considering the exponential growth of dedicated salad joints like Chopt, Mixt, Sweetgreen and whatever other obnoxiously named cafés I’m omitting.

Though it’s an easy way to introduce a hefty serving of veggies into one’s diet, eating what can sometimes taste like a bowl of grass for lunch every day gets pretty old.

salsa + ranch = <3

Enter homemade dressing. Using whatever ingredients are at one’s disposal to create new salad sauces helps dispel the monotony surrounding a daily dish of greens. In this particular salad, spicy salsa contrasts, and also carries farther the calorie count, of cool, creamy ranch, while hot peppers and onions offset crisp chilled lettuce and other veggies.

Other good ingredients to keep on-hand for homemade dressings are mustard (Dijon, regular, horseradish, whatever), honey, vinegar, lemons, limes, oranges, avocados, scallions, chiles, cilantro, basil, garlic, ketchup (haaaahahaha), Worcestershire, soy sauce, ginger…all it takes is a little imagination and a lot of quality olive oil.

Ensalada suroeste picante (spicy southwest salad)

onions and peppers (sautéed in olive oil, garlic and splashes of Worcestershire and tabasco)

black bean burger, cooked and diced

lettuce

carrots

red cabbage

pepper jack cheese

avocado

banana peppers

diced cherry tomatoes

salsa mixed with ranch dressing

vegetarian chili mac

There exist in this world three core belief systems with which every Texan must make peace at some point in his or her life. The first is God. The second is guns.

The third is chili.

Chili is the official state dish of Texas. According to Wikipedia (the modern be-all end-all of American history – Encyclopædia Britannica, your number's up), chili arrived with frontier settlers and spread throughout the southwestern United States as a result of San Antonio’s tourism industry.

proceed with caution

But, at the risk of eternally losing my Texas card, the following recipe violates state chili standards in three critical ways:

1) Its usage of beans. An old and quite common state saying goes something like “If you know beans about chili, you know chili ain’t got no beans.” But I can’t forgo them in my recipe. Absent beans, chili lacks the heartiness that so characterizes the dish.

2) Its substitution of veggie crumbles for ground beef. This will be considered sacrilege by many, and I hereby accept the subsequent Facebook defriendings that surely will ensue. But after it’s stewed for hours upon hours, I’m confident that this could survive a taste test among even the most insistent of carnivores.

3) Its mixing of macaroni. Texans serve chili with lots of crackers, lots of cheese and lots, lots, lots of hot sauce; pasta is rarely, if ever, included.

Perhaps from this recipe I’ve learned one thing – just like this chili, my particular brand of Texan may be composed of atypical traits. But sometimes a different batch of ingredients can still create something just as good as the real thing.

vegetarian chili

package veggie crumbles

black beans

canned diced tomatoes with chipotle (if you can’t find these then just add a can of chipotles in adobo)

Shiner Bock

onion

bell pepper

garlic

worcestershire

chili powder

cumin

paprika

oregano

tabasco (or chalula, whatever)

sriracha

crushed red pepper

salt & pepper

1 box whole-wheat elbow noodle (rotini would be good too)

 Slow-cook all ingredients except pasta on high for three to four hours. Cook pasta, toss with chili, top with cheddar cheese and serve with cold beer.

salted-caramel apple pie

Pertinent factoid: I do not bake.

Usually, if I bake something for you, I am either a) trying to poison you or b) apologizing for something I have done wrong.

Many wise women have said that the key to baking is precision. This requires an exceptional amount of patience, a trait of which I have decidedly little. I believe that in the kitchen one should be wild, experimental, instinctive, creative, not measuring and sifting and pinching and dashing.

That being said – I’m all about trying new things. So when a girlfriend of mine described preparing a peanut butter pie for her beloved, and his subsequent goddess-like worship of her, I figured there just might be something to getting all old-school domestic and making a pie.

Since neither B nor I are big peanut butter people (haha, picturing people made out of peanut butter, the funnies) I went with apple instead, with a drizzle of homemade salted caramel for good measure. And since B and I are both big bourbon fans, I went with a big hearty splash of Jack Daniels in the filling. Aaaand maybe a wee bit in my coffee, too…

3.14159265359

salted-caramel apple pie

1 double-crust pie crust recipe (I used the Trader Joe’s premade crust, don’t judge…)

6 green apples, thinly sliced

2 TBSP flour

½ cup sugar

1 TBSP cinnamon

1 TBSP lemon juice

1 cup salted caramel (click for recipe, big thanks to brown-eyed baker for step-by-step recipe with pictures)

Pinch salt

Pinch nutmeg

Big splash of bourbon

Preheat oven to 425. Mix all ingredients. Put in crust-lined pan, top with other crust, poke slits in top to vent. Bake for 45 minutes, let cool at least two hours before slicing, serving with vanilla ice cream and drizzling plate with extra salted caramel.

barbecue tofu broccoli cheddar pizza

Sounds weird, doesn't it? But sometimes weird can be good. Just look at Salvador Dali, chicken and waffles, Pink Floyd, prosthetic limbs...sometimes things that initially seem bizarre become actualized as masterpieces.

Masterpiece this was not, but it was strangely, surprisingly good. An extra hour at work and a tighter-than-normal budget combined forces to condemn me to a 30-minute cooking window using mostly on-hand ingredients, and thus was born this patchwork Frankensteinesque pie.

The broccoli edges toasted up all nice and crispy in the oven; sharp cheddar cut right through the sweet, smoky barbecue sauce, while sauteed onions and garlic lent depth and fragrance. And tofu, because protein.

B initially sounded skeptical when I suggested a barbecue-sauced pizza, but two glasses of wine and four slices later I think he’d begrudgingly accepted its existence. If begrudging acceptance is exemplified by taking leftovers to work the next day.  

barbecue tofu broccoli cheddar pizza

storebought pizza crust (Pillsbury cuz I’m simple like that)

barbecue sauce (Stubbs cuz I’m Texan)

broccoli, tossed with olive oil, salt & pepper 

tofu bites (recipe below)

extra sharp cheddar

onions

garlic

olive oil

salt and pepper

While pizza crust is pre-baking, sautee onions with garlic in olive oil, season with salt and pepper. Spread barbecue sauce on crust and sprinkle with toppings. Bake for 10-15 minutes or until pizza has reached desired crispitude.

crispy tofu bites

1 block extra-firm tofu

worcestershire sauce

honey

Whisk honey into Worcestershire sauce. Squeeze excess water out of tofu until it’s as dry as possible, dice into ½-inch cubes. Marinate cubes in Worcestershire-honey mixture for an hour. Bake for 30 minutes, turning once, at 400 degrees. Pop under broiler for a few minutes at end of baketime.

easy egg and avocado salad with tomatoes and banana peppers

Confession time: I am not an avocado fan.

This statement is not to be misread as “I am not a guacamole fan,” because let’s be honest: who ISN’T a guacamole fan? Maybe Hitler, because he’s German and dead, but that is probably about it. The additions of lime juice and spicy pico are in my opinion what turn bland, crayonlike alien green mush into creamy, tart chip heaven. Plain avocados merely pale in comparison.

But alas -- they’re good for you. Like, really good for you. So there I was this morning, bound and determined to somehow incorporate those wrinkly little suckers into my diet, thinking “how can I make this work?”

ready for my close-up

What resulted was the product of a sort-of kitchen-sink mentality: throw things together and see how it goes. And it went oh so very well. Spicy, tart banana peppers cut through the creaminess of the avocado and add the crunch that would have been present had I actually thought to stock celery in the refrigerator.  

And a little tip for you carni/omnivores out there: Adding crumbled bacon would send this salad off the charts.

omg hi

easy egg and avocado salad with tomatoes and banana peppers

4 eggs, hard-boiled and diced

1 avocado, diced

banana peppers, minced

grape tomatoes, quartered

mustard (I used regular but whole-grain would be much amazings)

garlic powder

tabasco

salt and pepper

Mix everything together sloppily in a bowl while racing the clock to make it to work on time. Slather on toast with veggies, try not to spill all over self during commute.